Rizzo and Antonio

So after doing a favor for a friend that consisted of a free haircut for the mange of hair atop my skull, I accompanied him to a local youth basketball game, so he and another friend of mine could coach their basketball team. I really did not want to go along for this. I really wanted to go home, walk my dog, and get to work on this blog. I decided to tag along, with the intentions of making an early exit from the gym the first chance afforded to me. This chance made itself known fairly quick. We arrived and my other buddy informed us that only two players showed up for their game. Eventually a third player arrived, but this was not enough to field a team. The buddy I arrived with did not want to be there, I could tell, he began pushing for a forfeit. My other buddy readily agreed with him, something I found odd, but what the hell, I wanted to leave. As they called over the league coordinator to inform him of their situation, he presented them with two alternative choices: gather up some older kids and take a loss on paper but still play the game with a chance to win, or pick up some younger kids and play for a full victory. What was most important to me at that moment is that the coordinator never mentioned a word about forfeiting.

This took me aback, it also took my coaching buddies aback also. They never once considered his alternatives, and even once they became options, it was like they wanted nothing more than to forfeit... but they could not do so now. The game as they saw it was about them, how could it not be? The players were not their primary concern, especially since all of their starters were absent and the only players they had were bench warmers, including Rizzo, a small boy no older than thirteen, with braces, and the constant reminder that he had diabetes, something the coaches would constantly utter. Why? I have no clue. Maybe, they used it as an excuse as to not play the kid as much as they should. Now, however, they would have to play him the entire 32 minutes. First they had a choice, older kids or younger. I strongly voiced my opinion here; they had to play to win. The oldest player of theirs soundly agreed with me. And just like that, a slew of younger kids from 11-13 years of age swarmed us for the chance to play against a team of 14-15 year old opponents. Antonio was one of the new recruits and he was also the youngest. My coaching friends went through the motions, they were never into it. I on the other hand wished more than anything that I knew the game of basketball because their team could have pulled it off with the right guidance. Long story short of it though is this: Rizzo got to play the entire game, he got to prove to himself that he could go despite whatever labels have been attached to him; and Antonio hit 6 three-point baskets. Despite the loss, he was the focus after the game as both teams and all spectators offered him congratulations. The amount of confidence these boys gained today probably cannot be measured... I felt good afterwards, and I did not even do anything but cheer them on. With one more out of control ego present on the coaching staff(my own  ego included) these kids might not have gotten these personal victories and that would have been a shame.

Distractions

How easily am I distracted. I got a whole helluva' lot going on right now. Case in point: I had to cancel my spring break plans to San Diego to see my wife. The military decided to send her off somewhere in the desert. They have her leaving on the holiday tomorrow, but the problem is she is just finding out about this. They told her Thursday. I tend to overreact often, but in this situation I like to think I gave the appropriate response. I canceled my vacation and began looking for last minute flights out of Boston and hotels for the next day. Only someone who had good intentions, questionable, wanted to assist me. I told them I had it under control. Now this person is right over my shoulder, mind you, insisting despite my firm answer. As I am trying to multi-task, the same question is being tossed at me in different forms: "What can I do to help you?, Is there anything I can do?, See if there are any AAA awards benefits?" etc. to the point where I no longer know what I am looking for on the computer, on Orbitz and Priceline and many other travel websites. Then, I become rude, relocate somewhere quiet, and frantically find some travel arrangements...

That lead me to Logan Airport the next day at check-in, an hour prior to my flight's departure. Only, somehow, despite having a clear plan of attack in constructing a flight itinerary, I chose the month of March for my departure date on Orbitz, not the month of February. I need space, I need time to do things quietly, with little distractions, but I also appreciate help and assistance. Not bombarding me with questions is assisting me if I ask to be left alone momentarily to book my flight without distraction. I guess this is just me being careless, as usual; the world tells me I need to focus and pay attention. Pay attention. In crisis mode at the airport, I paid enough attention to dash from terminal A to terminal C to secure the last seat on a Jet Blue flight heading to Long Beach California, a long way from San Diego, where she and I went to Sea World yesterday, and an even longer way from my eventual arrival of Texas to see my wife off as she travels into harm's way. Yet, I need to pay attention more when it counts, and not be so easily distracted.

Express Glasses

Sometimes, I'll wear eye glasses despite my 20/20 vision. There's a reason for this. I cannot maintain eye contact without a barrier between my gaze and whomever meets it with his or her own. At times, it physically hurts me to maintain such communication. That's what eye contact is, standard communication. When I wear my glasses, reality is filtered through their lenses, like a broadcast transmitted by a television screen, and believe me; I can watch t.v. That's just the tip of the iceberg. Once I'm able to maintain eye contact with someone, I lose track of what is being discussed because I cannot decipher mood and nonverbal language while simultaneously following the conversation, which, like all convos I have ever had, easily trails off into a minute-long dud. I suffer from inattentive-ADHD and NLVD, non-verbal learning disorder, which is on the autism spectrum. This blog will be about how I deal with these issues because they have gone undiagnosed throughout my entire life... until now, I thought I was normal, or, how I saw the world, perceived it, interacted with it, is how everyone else did also.

But, somewhere, deep inside my subconscious mind, I must have known something wasn't right, so I went to the mall and bought a pair of glasses that help me see a little clearer; and since then my life has not been the same.